Solitaire
No, I'm not referring to the card game. I'm describing myself. Another weekend spent by myself for the most part. By choice. Now that I've actually tolerated somebody more than 2 dates (yes, it's true), and there are other men who want to take me out .... I don't feel like it. I'm trying to figure out whether I'm just freaked out by the prospect of somebody actually liking me and wanting to pursue a relationship .... I don't know. What's the point, really? You meet somebody, you like them, you share good times, you sleep with them, you start getting each others' history, little things start bugging you, you have to meet the family and friends, you worry about where this is going, the disagreements start ..... blah.

I'm really digging being me and doing all the me things that I want. I think that some companionship would be nice every now and then, and don't even talk about the lack of sex that I'm experiencing right now. But I want things on my terms. And that's not realistic. I wish that I could buy a vending machine that dispenses men. I could keep it in my garage and when I felt like a little something then all I'd have to do is make my selection and press a button.