Reflections .....
A woman that I work with had surgery yesterday to remove a tumour from her spine - it was compressing her spinal cord and the surgeon couldn't believe that she wasn't a quadriplegic. She's 29. The surgery went well (5 1/2 hours) and I don't know if the tumour was benign or not - with central nervous system tumours it sometimes doesn't matter though. Why do these things happen? One day you're complaining about the tingling in your arms, and the next day you're having surgery that might result in you never walking again, and yet if you don't have the surgery you definitely will never walk again.

Life is such a crapshoot. I've had a lot of stuff thrown at me over the years, but nothing like what this woman is going through. I almost feel silly for worrying about my upcoming surgery. I think what worries me the most (and this is sooooooo dumb) is that I don't have anybody who will be there to worry about me, or to visit me, or what if nobody even asks about me and how things went? Isn't that crazy that I just want people to make a big deal about me for a change? Is that the only way that I know that people actually care? I've done such a good job at keeping people at a distance that I ultimately pay the price for doing that.