Dear Marta ...
Today I had 2 of my graduates who are now working at the hospital that I work at visit me in my office. They both came to me looking for some advice on work-related things - one of them spent about an hour with me and it turned into more of a therapy session. Here's the thing - I'm great at dishing out advice, but not so good at following it. I talk a good game when it comes to not taking responsiblity for other people's "stuff", suggestions for conflict resolution, and not letting other people's insecurities get the best of us. But if I take a good look at myself, I have a hard time taking my own advice. I tend to take things personally, and while I may appear on the outside that things slide off my shoulders, I am sometimes deeply affected on the inside by what others do. Not to mention the fact that I am great at avoiding conflict.

I can hear my friend C now - Marta - you're too hard on yourself. Yes, I am - this much I know. And I've gotten much better over the past year and a half, but I also have to admit that I've done a great job at isolating myself over the years because it's nice and clean. I don't have to worry about people throwing their crap on me, or arguments, or put downs (save for a bit of sass from the boys every now and then). That's not reality is it? I guess that it will have to be my reality for now, and I'll keep working through other people's personal problems until I can find some of my own.